The signs of a villain are: everything you hate in us will never change ever. Ever.

– Twiztid

While I don’t typically get my philosophy from rap or horrorcore lyrics, I’ve gotta say that this lyric rings true.

All it takes for some people to see me or you as a villain is:

• be different enough to hate,

• and not be willing to conform to their ideals.

Heck, I’ve been labeled the villain so many times that I’ve lost count, all because I want to be my own person with my own thoughts and my own life. I don’t live to please others, though when I do, it makes me over the moon.

I’ve spent so long surrounded by people who had an idea of what they wanted me to be, and if that idea didn’t turn out to match reality, it became a me problem somehow.

I’ve been judged as evil or villainous over inconsequential things because of someone else’s ignorance.

You can see me channel a lot of that genuine rage into my horror writings.

I have a short story collection in the works called Heartbroken & Homicidal that is entirely about those romantic relationships that have gone awry. I’ve written many over the years, processing my feelings following a pretty toxic dating history.

I have several pieces in the White Lily collection where toxic family meets an unfortunate end for similar reasons.

Never again will I try to make others happy at the expense of my own happiness.

Everything they hate in me will never change ever. Ever.

If I’m a villain, I’m a particularly conniving one, given I dedicate most of my time to helping people.

Still, it’s better to be a villain than a puppet on a string.

Let me know if this resonates.

Also, let me know if you use writing to cope or process as well. 💜